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Quayle, Dan - More Dan
"It is wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago."
"If we do not succeed, we run the risk of failure."
"She was attracted to me by my intellectual curiosity."
"I did not know in 1969 that I would be in this room today, I'll confess." -- Senator Dan Quayle responding to questions in 1988 about allegations that he used family connections to get into the Indiana National Guard.
"We're all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the mistakes we may or may not have made."
"I've been told to keep my remarks relatively brief. I understand Quayle-hunting season begins at noon."
"The [Democrats] talked about putting people first. Well, they put people first unless you happen to be a spotted owl or a giant garter snake or some other endangered species and then that seems to have priority. Obviously, you take the bald eagle and things of that sort, of course you're going to make sure that they are saved and that they can live and you're going to take every precaution that you can. But others -- we just need a little flexibility."
"Unfortunately, the people of Louisiana are not racists."
"If you give a person a fish, they'll fish for a day. But if you train a person to fish, they'll fish for a lifetime."
"I'm not going to focus on what I have done in the past what I stand for, what I articulate to the American people. The American people will judge me on what I am saying and what I have done in the last 12 years in the Congress."
"I happen to be a Republican president -- ah, the vice president."
"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls."
"I want to be Robin to Bush's Batman."
Certainly, I know what to do, and when I am Vice President -- and I will be -- there will be contingency plans under different sets of situations. And I tell you what, I'm not going to go out and hold a news conference about it. I'm going to put it in a safe and keep it there! Does that answer your question?" -- Senator Dan Quayle, when asked what he would do if he assumed the Presidency.
"I had not had that question before." -- Senator Dan Quayle explaining why, during the Bentsen debate, he couldn't say what he would do if he suddenly became president.
"Want to hear a sad story about the Dukakis campaign? The governor of Massachusetts, he lost his top naval advisor last week. His rubber ducky drowned in the bathtub."
"I'm going to be a vice president very much like George Bush was. He proved to be a very effective vice president, perhaps the most effective we've had in a couple of hundred years."
"I hope there's some respect and dignity for things I did not do."
"Let me say it one more time. It is ill-rel-e-vant." -- Senator Dan Quayle testily responding to repeated questions about his parents' involvement in the John Birch Society.
"Because. Because I say it isn't." -- Senator Dan Quayle explaining why questions about his parents' ties to the John Birch Society aren't relevant.
"That's solid. There, you see how much I learned." -- Vice President Dan Quayle when visiting a welding class at a vocational school in Union, Missouri. He welded two scraps of metal together to demonstrate how much he had learned while in the National Guard.
"Add one little bit on the end... Think of `potatoe', how's it spelled? You're right phonetically, but what else? There ya go... all right!" -- Vice President Dan Quayle correcting a student's correct spelling of the word `potato' during a spelling bee at an elementary school in Trenton.
"Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things."
"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."
"I should have caught the mistake on that spelling bee card. But as Mark Twain once said, `You should never trust a man who has only one way to spell a word'." -- Vice President Dan Quayle, actually quoting from President Andrew Jackson.
"I should have remembered that was Andrew Jackson who said that, since he got his nickname `Stonewall' by vetoing bills passed by Congress." -- Vice President Dan Quayle, confusing Andrew Jackson with Confederate General Thomas J. `Stonewall' Jackson, who actually got his nickname at the first Battle of Bull Run.
"I have made good judgments in the Past. I have made good judgments in the Future."
"In George Bush you get experience, and with me you get -- The Future!"
"The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that Dan Quayle may or may not make."
"My friends, no matter how rough the road may be, we can and we will never, never surrender to what is right."
"Okay, I won't open it until then." -- Vice President Dan Quayle after having been presented with an empty box that was to contain a gift from a sailing team in South America. He was told that the gift was not ready yet, but that it would be presented to him when they arrived in the United States.
"The other day [the President] said, I know you've had some rough times, and I want to do something that will show the nation what faith that I have in you, in your maturity and sense of responsibility. [He paused, then said] Would you like a puppy?"
"Although in public I refer to him as Mr. Vice President, in private I call him George... When I talked to him on the phone yesterday. I called him George rather than Mr. Vice President. But, in public, it's Mr. Vice President, because that's who he is."
"They asked me to go in front of the Reagans. I'm not used to going in front of President Reagan, so we went out behind the Bushes."
"I'm the Vice-President. They know it, and they know that I know it."
"We are doing the right thing and we do not see the bad things."
"This president is going to lead us out of this recovery. It will happen." -- Vice President Dan Quayle at a campaign stop.
"If Ross Perot runs, that's good for us. If he doesn't run, it's good for us." [A reporter then asked him what he meant by that] "That's for you to figure out."
"I love California; I practically grew up in Phoenix."
"...Buzz Lukens took that fateful step..." -- Vice President Dan Quayle confusing the sexual assaulter/Congressman with Astronaut Buzz Aldrin.
"We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world."
"Speaking as a man, it's not a woman's issue. Us men are tired of losing our women." -- Vice President Dan Quayle talking about breast cancer
"We expect them [Salvadoran officials] to work toward the elimination of human rights in accordance with the pursuit of Justice."
"El Salvador is a democracy so it's not surprising that there are many voices to be heard here. Yet in my conversations with Salvadorans... I have heard a single voice."
"We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur."
"I'm ready." -- Vice President Dan Quayle describing his ability to take over the presidency after President Bush vomits and collapses in Tokyo
"I was known as the chief grave robber of my state."
"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change."
"The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. I didn't live in this century."
"What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is."
"Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child."
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Contributed By:
Dickfish on 08-23-2000
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Comments:
DATo_Diomedies_DATonian writes:
Bush picked him as his running mate for two reasons: 1.) By comparison Quale would make Bush appear a genius - an intellectual with a brain of inter-galactic proportions. 2a.) It increased his security from threat. No American, no matter how unpatriotic, would kill Bush knowing that his fate and the fate of his family would be in the hands of Dan Quale. 2b.) No enemy of the United States would attempt an assassination which would ultimately place Quale's hand anywhere near the nuclear button with a push button phone nearby.
252 of 271 people found this comment helpful. Did you? Yes
warren writes:
A joke. When Dan Quayle came to Australia the president gave him a private note to give to the Prime Minister. When the PM looked at the note he read, "Disregard the person who gave you this note. He is an idiot!!"
88 of 117 people found this comment helpful. Did you? Yes


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